Post by ~arabiangal~ on Jun 24, 2005 10:02:00 GMT -5
What to Talk about on a First Date
by Sarah Paul
You open the door and your heart catches in your throat. He's
gorgeous. He opens the door of the car for you, and neither of you
have much to say as you drive to the restaurant. Basic
conversation about what you do and where you're from takes you
through starters. Then, in the lull before the entrees come, both
of you fall silent. You stare at the water glass. He starts to
fold his napkin. Oh no, you think, is he bored of me already? At
the next table you catch a glimpse of a couple laughing; the girl
is telling a story, and her date is leaning forward to catch every
word. That could be you ... if you only knew what to say.
Don't get caught with nothing to say on a first date! The women
who can keep a guy's interest from the moment he meets her know a
secret: guys love relaxed, warm, funny, positive gals who like
hearing them talk. There is nothing that a guy finds more
flattering than to be asked about his opinions and experiences.
So when you find yourself in a situation where the silence starts
to grow, ask a question! What do you want to know about this guy?
What intrigues you?
When you're on a first date, remember the following tips.
1. Keep all conversation positive. Never bring up negative things,
like how hard your life is right now, how complicated things are
with your parents, or how you're sorry that your nails are chipped
because you didn't have time for a manicure. Never complain about
ANYTHING. Avoid talking about your expectations for a relationship
and ANY controversial subjects until you get to know him better.
2. Relax! When you are nervous, you often speak faster, and you may
appear more serious, intense, or silly than you usually are.
Before you go out on your date, you may want to try watching a
funny movie. Laughing will relax all your muscles, send good
feelings to your brain, and get your blood pumping. You'll greet
your guy with a great big smile on your face--and he'll think it's
all because of him.
3. When he is talking, lean forward and actively listen. Flirtatious
signals such as crossing your legs, playing with your hair, or even
cupping your hand under your chin may make him aware of your
attributes. Guys respond to visual cues much better than verbal
ones. If you're interested, let your body do the talking for you.
4. Don't ask the same old questions. Everyone gets asked what they do
or where they're from. Try some questions that he's never been
asked before. If you can, focus the question on something that
you've noticed about him specifically.
5. Avoid asking him questions about his job or the kind of car he
drives or whether he owns his own house. It may appear as if
you're a gold-digger who won't take any guy who makes less than
Donald Trump.
6. If you've got any interesting hobbies or an unusual job, play it
up! Guys love independent women with adventurous streaks. They
imagine that she might just spring some new kind of adventure on
them.
Just don't go on about it too long. He may look as if he's
enjoying listening to you, but any date that goes on and on becomes
a bore. Turn the conversation back to him so that you get to know
as much about him as possible ... which is the point
of the date, after all. You already know about yourself!
7. Give him a little help, but don't do all the work yourself. As
much as we may believe that the world is 50% men and 50% women, and
all responsibilities should be divided accordingly, in the realm of
romance men still like to feel as if they wear the pants. Help a
guy along a bit on conversation if things are floundering, but let
him guide the conversation as much as you can. He wants to make a
good impression on you just as much as you want to make a good
impression on him.
Here are some other conversation starters that you might try to
break the ice.
Conversation Starter #1:
"What's your favorite sport? Do you follow any teams?"
Guys love to talk about sports, and they'll be more than willing to
share the details on their favorite team. Asking this kind of
question tells a guy that you're willing to go halfway and that
you're not going to find his statistics-spouting boring as dirt.
It will relax him immediately ... and, if you like sports, too, it
will be a match made in heaven.
Conversation Starter #2:
"That's a cool watch/shirt/pair of shoes. Where did you get it?"
The fact that you've noticed some aspect of his appearance will
mean a lot to him. He'll feel flattered that you've been checking
him out, and examining it more closely will require that you lean
close and even touch it for a closer look. This is a
great opportunity to show how fantastic you think he looks ... and
guys don't get compliments like that often.
Conversation Starter #3:
"Have you ever done X?"
Your first date is when you start to find common ground, and
comparing hobbies and experiences is the first place to start.
Asking your date about his experiences can allow him to brag a
little or give you the opportunity to bring up cool things that you
have done.
Conversation Starter #4:
"Have you ever been to Y?"
Everyone likes talking about places they've been. Ask him if he
has ever been to a local hotspot that you enjoy. Maybe it's a
club, a coffee shop, a museum, or even a park or hiking trail. If
he hasn't been there, and you are hitting it off by that point, he
may very well see that as a suggestion to use when asking you for a
second date!
Good luck! I hope that these conversation starters help you to
break the ice. In my book "How to be Irresistible to Men," there
are many more chapters on other incredibly important traits that'll
make men find you extremely attractive, such as how to communicate,
why men need to feel successful, the tantalize technique for
seducing men, and much, much more.
by Sarah Paul
You open the door and your heart catches in your throat. He's
gorgeous. He opens the door of the car for you, and neither of you
have much to say as you drive to the restaurant. Basic
conversation about what you do and where you're from takes you
through starters. Then, in the lull before the entrees come, both
of you fall silent. You stare at the water glass. He starts to
fold his napkin. Oh no, you think, is he bored of me already? At
the next table you catch a glimpse of a couple laughing; the girl
is telling a story, and her date is leaning forward to catch every
word. That could be you ... if you only knew what to say.
Don't get caught with nothing to say on a first date! The women
who can keep a guy's interest from the moment he meets her know a
secret: guys love relaxed, warm, funny, positive gals who like
hearing them talk. There is nothing that a guy finds more
flattering than to be asked about his opinions and experiences.
So when you find yourself in a situation where the silence starts
to grow, ask a question! What do you want to know about this guy?
What intrigues you?
When you're on a first date, remember the following tips.
1. Keep all conversation positive. Never bring up negative things,
like how hard your life is right now, how complicated things are
with your parents, or how you're sorry that your nails are chipped
because you didn't have time for a manicure. Never complain about
ANYTHING. Avoid talking about your expectations for a relationship
and ANY controversial subjects until you get to know him better.
2. Relax! When you are nervous, you often speak faster, and you may
appear more serious, intense, or silly than you usually are.
Before you go out on your date, you may want to try watching a
funny movie. Laughing will relax all your muscles, send good
feelings to your brain, and get your blood pumping. You'll greet
your guy with a great big smile on your face--and he'll think it's
all because of him.
3. When he is talking, lean forward and actively listen. Flirtatious
signals such as crossing your legs, playing with your hair, or even
cupping your hand under your chin may make him aware of your
attributes. Guys respond to visual cues much better than verbal
ones. If you're interested, let your body do the talking for you.
4. Don't ask the same old questions. Everyone gets asked what they do
or where they're from. Try some questions that he's never been
asked before. If you can, focus the question on something that
you've noticed about him specifically.
5. Avoid asking him questions about his job or the kind of car he
drives or whether he owns his own house. It may appear as if
you're a gold-digger who won't take any guy who makes less than
Donald Trump.
6. If you've got any interesting hobbies or an unusual job, play it
up! Guys love independent women with adventurous streaks. They
imagine that she might just spring some new kind of adventure on
them.
Just don't go on about it too long. He may look as if he's
enjoying listening to you, but any date that goes on and on becomes
a bore. Turn the conversation back to him so that you get to know
as much about him as possible ... which is the point
of the date, after all. You already know about yourself!
7. Give him a little help, but don't do all the work yourself. As
much as we may believe that the world is 50% men and 50% women, and
all responsibilities should be divided accordingly, in the realm of
romance men still like to feel as if they wear the pants. Help a
guy along a bit on conversation if things are floundering, but let
him guide the conversation as much as you can. He wants to make a
good impression on you just as much as you want to make a good
impression on him.
Here are some other conversation starters that you might try to
break the ice.
Conversation Starter #1:
"What's your favorite sport? Do you follow any teams?"
Guys love to talk about sports, and they'll be more than willing to
share the details on their favorite team. Asking this kind of
question tells a guy that you're willing to go halfway and that
you're not going to find his statistics-spouting boring as dirt.
It will relax him immediately ... and, if you like sports, too, it
will be a match made in heaven.
Conversation Starter #2:
"That's a cool watch/shirt/pair of shoes. Where did you get it?"
The fact that you've noticed some aspect of his appearance will
mean a lot to him. He'll feel flattered that you've been checking
him out, and examining it more closely will require that you lean
close and even touch it for a closer look. This is a
great opportunity to show how fantastic you think he looks ... and
guys don't get compliments like that often.
Conversation Starter #3:
"Have you ever done X?"
Your first date is when you start to find common ground, and
comparing hobbies and experiences is the first place to start.
Asking your date about his experiences can allow him to brag a
little or give you the opportunity to bring up cool things that you
have done.
Conversation Starter #4:
"Have you ever been to Y?"
Everyone likes talking about places they've been. Ask him if he
has ever been to a local hotspot that you enjoy. Maybe it's a
club, a coffee shop, a museum, or even a park or hiking trail. If
he hasn't been there, and you are hitting it off by that point, he
may very well see that as a suggestion to use when asking you for a
second date!
Good luck! I hope that these conversation starters help you to
break the ice. In my book "How to be Irresistible to Men," there
are many more chapters on other incredibly important traits that'll
make men find you extremely attractive, such as how to communicate,
why men need to feel successful, the tantalize technique for
seducing men, and much, much more.
